Memories of an ex-Archangel
by Sabrialthazar
Summary: Gabriel never really died, just turned into a human with no memory of ever being an archangel. Then, one life altering October, he remembers everything. That's when his life goes from great to insane.
1. And so it was

_The rain was falling much more steadily now than it had been in the earlier hours of the day. Most people would take the rain as a bad sign, I am not most people. I'm not even a person, I'm the archangel Gabriel. And I love the rain. Almost as much as candy._

**Chapter one: And so it was**

_October sixth, two thousand fourteen. 4:37 P.M._

Today was supposed to be a typical day; it wasn't. Today was supposed to be relaxing; it wasn't. Today was one of the most insane days of my life, and being a archangel-turned-Trickster-turned-archangel-again-turned-human, that was really saying something about today.

You may be wondering what was so extraordinary about today's events, my answer would 'Not much'. You may now be wondering that if today wasn't so extraordinary, why was it so insane? My answer would be that, 'If any day wasn't insane we would all be bored. Everyday day is insane'.So yes, maybe today wasn't as unusual as I have led you to believe. And maybe it was; you'll just have to use your imagination.

So, you may be pissed that I have deceived you. But, I am still very much in a Trickster frame of mind. Maybe today was insane and I am choosing not to tell you about it? That would be an excellent plot twist, if my life was in fact a story. But you're just a blog, what do you know?

I may, perhaps later on, may choose to tell you about today's events. Let's just say that it is not a day I would wish to relive. And so it was, a truly insane day. At least in my mind anyway.

The only normal things about today was that I got up at six A.M. exactly. And that I skipped breakfast, as usual.

Some crazy things were: That I somehow gained all my memories back and remember being an archangel. I remembered how I died, I remembered how my older brother, Lucifer, killed me. But I do know that I would never want to go back, I love being a human and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world. Except, maybe a whole lot of candy.

And so it was, a truly memorable day.


	2. What now?

_It hasn't stopped raining for the last three days. I'm starting to think that rain is a bad sign, after all. The only thing more depressing than the rain is the fact that my human life is a lie! All the memories I thought were true were just lies! I wonder if my human 'family' knows this?_

**Chapter two: What now?**

* * *

I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to do now, now that I know what I was. But I do know two people who would be able to help me. The Winchesters. But how am I going to find them?

There is one, much simpler, way to find the Winchesters. It's way to risky though, so many problems. With any luck Castiel will realize I have my memories back, stop by to investigate and I can get all the information I need from him. But it has been three days now! If he was going to come he would be here by now, but time does go by very slow in heaven. Or maybe he's busy?

Or I could just try to track them down, but that's to complicated. I could find Crowley, bet he hasn't changed his safe house in the past four years, and get the information from him. So it's wait for Castiel or find Crowley.

* * *

So this is Crowley's house? At least it was only two hours away, I think I'm somewhere in New Hampshire. The house isn't to stylish though, it looks really old, older than I remember.

The only question now is whether or whether not Crowley is home. I really hope he is.

I got out of the car and instantly felt cold. (Is it always this cold wherever the hell I am? ) As I walked to the front door I felt something, Crowley was obviously home.

I knocked and almost instantly Crowley opened the door.

"Wow, this isn't good, love. How are you alive?" Crowley asked, he still hadn't invited me in. The stupid asshole.

"I was never dead. Are you really just going to leave me standing out here in this weather?" I questioned. Not really waiting for an invite I shoved past him and into the house.

"You were never dead?" Crowley asked.

"What are you, a Mockingbird? Yeah, the only problem is that I'm human. Sorry to disappoint, not exactly here to help with whatever evil scheme you're up to," and then I added quickly, "You better not try to kill me!"

"Kill you? Why would I do that? You're the only Angel left who isn't so... irritating. Lucifer's in the cage."

"So the Winchesters succeeded, good."

The room had the same old felling as the house, although it looked it had just been repainted recently. It had new furniture but something about made it seem old. Maybe it was the really old-looking bookcase?

"So, human. How's that been treating you?" Crowley asked. After, of course, he poured himself some Craig.

"Fine. Until recently, that is." I said, not caring to explain anything.

"I know you came for something. What?"

"I need your help. I need you to help me find the Winchesters."

"How convenient," Crowley smirk grew more apparent."It Just so happens that the Moose and his Squirrel are coming over for a little chat later. And of course Castiel is joining them."

"What now?" I asked, more nervous than before. Why were they coming to see Crowley in the first place. When did they meet Crowley?

"We wait."

So, with Crowley no longer feeling the need to explain anything, and I no longer feeling the need to chat. we waited. Until finally the Winchesters, and of course Castiel, shown up.

I, of course, opened the door. Man you should have seen their faces!

"Gabriel?" Sam asked, he looked pretty confused.

"Hey, Samsquatch." I said, not waiting for his response. I looked at Castiel, he looked like he was guilty of something. Why?

"I'm sorry Gabriel. It seems now that giving you the memories of your past was not a good idea. Now there is a large reward for whoever brings you in, dead or alive." Castiel apologized. I, however crazy this might sound, wasn't worried. Not one bit.

"WAIT! does that mean I have my own 'Wanted' poster? That's so cool. I always wanted to be a villain. I'm more of an anti-hero though. Now I see why Crowley is always so awesome!" I exclaimed, not really as excited as I sounded. But having my own wanted poster did seem pretty nice.

"Gabriel, this is serious! You're not exactly the hardest thing to kill!" Sam said. Aw, Sam was worried!

"Aw, Sammy! How sweet, you're worried about me! Isn't that just the most ADORABLE thing you ever heard of?" I said, making a point to be as sarcastic as I possibly could.

"I'd really hate to spoil you two love-bids time but, are we forgetting that there are some things that need to be discussed?" Crowley rudely said. When is Crowley not be sarcastic?

"Well, I think Crowley is on the right track." Castiel said, making his annoyance of myself known. Castiel has always been way to serious!

" Where on earth is Dean Winchester?" I asked.

"He didn't want to come." Castiel said, looking more than a little upset. Aw, did Cas and Dean-o have an argument? That's so cute!

* * *

A/N: I know, the pace is a bit weird and the chapters are short. But they will be longer soon. Please leave a review and tell me what you think.

"


	3. Dean and Gabe have a chat

_There are many things I've wanted to say to Sam since I have gotten my memories back. But the one thing I really want to say is the one I never will be able to. Fate has cursed me with all of these\memories and all of these feelings. All of these things that used to be so distant and confusing, now I can't imagine my life without them_

* * *

**Chapter three: Dean and Gabriel have a chat.**

**October 10, 2014**

" Dean-o. Happy to see me?" I said, I found Dean alone in a bar. How typically Dean of him!

"Gabriel, so Castiel did give you your memories back. I told him not to..." Dean said. So that was what he and Cas were fighting about?

"So that's why Cas is being so pouty! Dean-o, you really know how to treat a man!"

"Oh, I see you are still annoying." Dean pouted. I've had too much with pouty people for fifty lives!

"Dean?"

"What?"

"How could you stand being human for so long? I've only been human for, like, four years. It's fucking impossible!" I said. Finally telling my true feelings to someone, someone I have never gotten along with.

"And, that's why most people drink. Really helps numb the pain. And feelings" Dean explained

"So, that's why."

"What's your problem?"

"Because five days ago I was just a fucking human and now I have all these stupid memories of being an archangel. And now Castiel is trying to make me an angel again! At least since I'm human I won't live forever..." I explained. For some reason it was really easy to talk to Dean, like he knew what I was going through.

"I knew you wouldn't want your memories back, but Castiel did it any way. Why is he so damn sensitive?"

"He's always been like that. You just need to apologize to him, even if you weren't the one who was wrong."

"Really?"

"Yes! Now go kiss and make up, already. He's at Crowley's house." I said.

I walked out the front door of the bar and started to walk down the street. I wasn't sure where I was headed. I really hope Dean took my advice...

As I walked I started to wonder what was happening at Crowley's house. I didn't tell everyone that I was leaving. I left. Was Dean going to rat me out?

* * *

_A/N: Yes, shortness. Hey, look! Dean and Gabe are getting closer!_

_Next chapter will be much longer, I promise!_


	4. NOT A CHAPTER, AN!

This isn't a chapter update, sorry Kittens. anyway, I have really lost any inspiration I initially had to write this story. I did promise to finish it one day, and I will. I just need to take a little time to get motivated and figure out exactly how I'm going to do this story. Sorry if you hate me!

In the mean time, you can check out my other stories.


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